When Your Sense of Mission is a Phantom of a Past Life


by David Nova

“Following major extremity amputation a large proportion of patients will retain quite specific
of their missing limb, persisting for months, years, or as long as they live.”
Kenneth E. Livingston MD on Phantom Limb Syndrome

Medical science is aware of the phenomenon known as Phantom Limb Syndrome, yet limited by their beliefs about the physical world, they don’t quite understand the mechanism of it. When a person loses a physical limb, such as an arm or leg, the sensation of that limb still persists because our etheric body and astral body are still completely intact.

A similar scenario is true of our past life experiences. When we are reincarnated into this physical world the memories of our past lives are basically amputated from our consciousness. They are removed, gone. And yet some or all of these memories are still available to us through our etheric body and our Akashic record. They are not lost, merely hidden from us.

Yet strong impressions of these memories can be very persistent in our current life or incarnation, even without doing any specific spiritual work, a sort of Phantom Past Life Syndrome. With some disciplined spiritual work we can potentially recover more of our past life experiences and memories.

These impressions of past life memories often inform who we are in this life, or who we think we are. If we were a classically trained musician in a previous life, we might have some inherent musical talent or musical interest in this life. If we suffered a specific trauma in a past life or lives, such as drowning, we might have a subconscious fear of swimming in this life. Are these memory leaks? They don’t arrive fully-formed in our conscious mind, like a memory of yesterday’s lunch, but rather rise up from our subconsciousness and our body consciousness like a phantom memory. Some of our current passions, our strengths, and our burdens come from our past lives. When we are young we subconsciously incorporate these impressions into our current life experience. As we get older we can actively work to integrate our past lives into our total Being.

I’ve been trying to do this work myself, for some time now, trying to integrate specific past life impressions into my total Being. It can be a difficult process. Thus I will use my own experience as an example.

I have always felt that there was a huge unknown gap in my life, even as a child, I knew I wasn’t experiencing my complete, authentic self. I have always been aware that my sense of identity felt amputated and incomplete, as if I was missing a big part of myself. We all have this feeling, that we’re not living up to our fullest potential, yet in my case I persistently felt like I didn’t know who I was. Something was missing. A big chunk of knowledge, but with enough impressions to realize that I had forgotten who I really was, even as a kid.

However, the retrieval of past life memories can be a mixed blessing, because we are not here to relive the same life exactly as it was before, or re-become the same person and make the same decisions. Like it or not, we are here for change, for something slightly different, to learn to make some different choices, and we often can’t do that when we are too attached to an old version of ourself. A stronger past life personality will try to assume a dominant role.

I was a more active ego in some of my previous lives, which is why my current life feels a little inadequate to the largeness of my previous selves. From what I’ve learned I was a crusader and a warrior in many of my past lives, including a lifetime as a Knight Templar. Some of my past lives were not on Earth, but as a crusader and a warrior non-the-less. I considered myself a Crusader for the Light. My guides heartily agree, but then they are always trying to put the best and most loving spin on any revelation. They are just parents who love their child unconditionally, but in my opinion, sometimes too much sugar-coating is simply not healthy. “A spoon full of sugar may help the medicine go down,” but it will also give you cavities.

The truth apparently is that nearly all of these past lives ended tragically, in battle, tortured to death, as a martyr. I believe this is likely why I’ve suffered with some low-grade depression throughout my current life. Why I have a very strong aversion to playing the martyr again – which probably explains my childhood gut-level rejection of Christianity, a religion I likely once fought to the death for. Fortunately, that was never the plan for my current life. Perhaps I came back to learn (and teach) that I don’t need to be a crusader and a warrior to stand in the Light or the Truth.

The path of the Crusader/Warrior is very much a dualistic path, and there are many people, light workers and white hats, who have yet to learn this spiritual lesson. The dualistic path is ultimately a trap. It keeps you trapped in the great game, a game that MUST HAVE  two sides playing in order to continue. It feeds you a sense of purpose and identity to continue to fight against something (which because we are all One being, we are ultimately fighting ourselves.) And it brings you back into the game, again and again, after every failure, expecting a different result. What’s the definition of insanity? Recycling.

Perhaps a past life identity is not the identity that we should be pursuing, particularity when it feels strong, determined, full of purpose, passion, and conviction, a little too ready to lay down its life for a cause. There is a strong sense of ‘aliveness’ to such a large personality, and yet it is only living for the great game. Eventually it takes a great weariness of the game to shake us awake, to finally leave the path of duality and step up to the next level.

More about this topic is to come.

About the Author

David Nova is the author of the metaphysical fiction series “Season of the Serpent.”  He is a truth-seeker, a Wanderer, a blogger, and was the moderator of Deus Nexus: Messages For An Entangled Universe.

This article is offered under Creative Commons license. It’s okay to republish it anywhere as long as attribution bio is included and all links remain intact.

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